Jilted & Gulliable

reading the previous entry makes me laugh. Jasdev is funny.. well that's the least i can tell about him cuz i just got to know him recently and besides that, i did notice him when he first enrolled for my college, actually on the orientation day itself. hah! im SO observant, am i not? ;p yada yada yada...

Yesterday I attended my friend’s farewell party at his place. It was fun. We then went to Sega and chilling out there. I had tequila, the people at Sega.. urgh, bad service. Obviously if I did not say on the rocks or mix with cola or sprite, they should have known or at least the basic thing is to be on the rocks right? (am I making sense here? Hmm) well I just HAVE to ask them to add some ice and sprite for me, sheesh.
I thank Ted for dropping me back home, very sweet and nice fella. Also, a very good friend of mine :) On our way back, I told him that I’m depressed and I feel alone, he understood. Thank god for that. It’s just that I may seem to be hanging on a smile on my face and I may seem to be happy, but deep down, I may not be as happy as I am showing. Well maybe it’s just that I don’t want to burden anyone with anything, I don’t think everybody understands what I’m feeling, I wouldn’t be making any sense then right? Or you may say that I’m, looking for a quick fix, sometimes I call someone up and just wishes to talk to them, not my problems of course, just plain talk, that’ll help. You know sometimes you wake up and you suddenly feel so lost in your life and you started crying for no reason at all. Life can be unfair, Life can be lame, Life can be stagnant, maybe mine’s stagnant. Maybe I should be more optimistic, maybe… just maybe.

I'm still killing time, it's so fucking hot out there, I'm sweating man!! and I have got a gig to attend tonight. I'm still waiting for someone to drop me home, hopefully someone nice. Two of the usual gig-goer mates of mine, refused to, well that's shittie. I might ask Eugene... but I've got doubts. He'll be having exams at 4pm and when and how should I approach him and ask him that? He's my only hope. Now's the time I REALLY cursed myself for not having a driving license. Don't count on anyone. I still can't believe that friend ditched me. sort of. Shit.
Pondering of how am I going there now, waiting for a miracle. Maybe I'm waiting to get ditched again. I'm going there but with no one to go with. My usual girl gig-goer mate can't make it, i cursed. Shit. Hmmm.. now I'm thinking of Jasdev. heh. Dude, are you reading this?! *yells* HHEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPP!!!!!!!!!

Now I'm dead broke. I only got 3 bucks left in my purse and wondering how am I going to pay for the cover charge at the gig. I'm SO screwed. I think I'm going to get something to eat. I had some teddy bear cookies just now, tasty. I need something to chew on, my fridge, here I come!!