*gasp* my eyes are still sore. its kind of reddish. hmm havent been getting enough of sleep.

hmm so okay here's the scoop: i was on the phone with putra.. yes yes Finally! :) and im really happy about it.

hey putra, if you are reading this, thank you. im really really glad that you called. at least that is the only thing that i look forward to or the only person that can take my mind off things. of all these while, i missed you. hope to hear from you soon though. im kind of freaking out actually. the prom is approaching and putra will be off to russia. man, wished that will never have to happen. take me with you... i want out. by the way putra havent been blogging.

hmm another hour to go before my class. im bored out.

just got an email from my another god brother who is studying in sabah but then he was back in penang and im not sure if he is still in penang but hmm i'll try to call him. he's a really hardcore metal shitz kind of person.
so okay, talking about god brother.. this another god brother of mine, who's staying in tg bungah, same area as i am.. well erm, he's a bit humm.. dunno. he went through a miserable week and so did i; i have been so fucking busy with everything that's been going on in my mind. having deadlines, screwed up mind and naggings to handle, im like, okay this is enough for me, i dont think i can handle this so i didnt call. while he, was expecting me to call and all. yes he did try to call my house but many times i have asked him to call up my cellphone and he just refused to do so. so probably he is expecting a lil too much from me. he reminds me of michelle. not good. not that i have a thing against her, but we just dont click i guess. i dont want to get close to him because i think she will misunderstand me and whatever. well he is in fact very grateful and appreciate her a lot. i dont want to know get myself involved since i am involved in some other stuff. my head is too packed. he was sort of pointing a finger at me and i think he was pushing me a lil too hard. see, i said i wasnt able to handle this. now i feel pathetic. yeah and he is going to call me tonight. O_o

hmm i have just decided not to write about eugene, jasdev and people so much anymore. you people out there reading this might think that i am like totally obsessed with them or rather have no life so the speak.

i had a great weekend though, what about you?
my pc wasnt with me so i have to go to my buddy's place to do assignments. later that night, a whole bunch of friends to cafe and damn i was dancing the whole night. jasdev rang me up and met me there with gopal and andrew. bumped into my brother, heheh pretty cool. at least i was burning some fat. yeah.. got up the next day feeling hungry first thing in the morning. so saturday i went to her place again and then we were bumping around and to mcD for dinner and to my place to borrow some sweaters from me. again jasdev called me up.. actually to go for a movie with miranda and gopal but i declined and since he called again and i guess he is persuasive, i then followed them to tari cafe and then to cat feringghi for joyride. it was fun, i enjoyed myself. i love nature. jasdev kinda introduced me to a new spot by the beachside. its lovely.

having to look back o what i have written i know it is not so inspirational or anything grand. im kind of stuck here and i dont know what to do right now, so i just crap. yay. *peace sign*

again, putra.. putra.... hmmmm.. still havent got you phone reloaded huh? heheh..
oh i just miss called my god bro again.. hope to hear from him soon. reminds me of gigs and there havent been any real gigs going on in penang. its so dead.

i found this somewhere.. and i think it is quite interesting. he is a good writer. very inspirational.

What is a promise of love? And how do you keep it?
I have been pondering over this question for a few weeks now, but have not been able to come to a proper conclusion. And it is nagging at the back of my head, refusing to let up.

A promise of love is, in it's very essence, an oxymoron. It is a lie - the biggest, most vicious lie one could ever tell.

"I'll always love you...".
"I'll never leave you..."
"You'll always be the only one that I love..."

All the things we whisper and share when we are in our relationships, all the promises that we make, hold true only while we are in love. As we fall helplessly into love, we, too, fall helplessly out of it. It is a feeling beyond our control. These promises are beautiful, but the moment the love dies, they shatter into a thousand glass shards. Hurting. Wounding. Killing.

And no matter how hard we might want to keep them, they now count for naught. In fact, keeping a promise of love that has died is a even greater sin.

Now. How do you stop yourself from making promises when you're in love? I don't know either.

So. If someone makes you a promise, listen and smile, for they have the power to make you happy and glow with warmth. But always remember:

One of the most dangerous things you can ask for when it comes to love, is a warranty card.

Make only the promises you can keep.




Chinese singer Faye Wong sings in one of her ethereal laments:

Who does not want me, I do not want
Who does not love me, I do not love
When I turn off the light
All the shadows will cease to exist

[SoundBites]
Duncan Sheik - I'm on a high