Fade

First, I was involved in an argument with my family members. Like what the fuck man, suddenly the world is against me? Oh hell, as if you people fucking care about me. Do you people reach out for me when I needed some comfort? Do you people even try to in the first place? Do you people talk to me when I was down and out? Do you people appreciate me the way I am? Do you people actually cares for what I think and what I feel? The answer is simple; it’s a ‘No’. I don’t get you people. So what if I use the word ‘fuck’? What is it wrong with me being friends or maybe I have had sided some Indians before this? Can’t I have my say? My beliefs and opinions? What is it that she have which I don't? You all keep on siding her. It is so unfair. She gets the attention and whatever that you name it but I don't. Just leave me alone. I don’t need your sympathy. Why is it me? Why can’t you just accept me the way that I am? I am going through a teenage rebellion phase as one of friend would say. Just let me be. I have mood swings, so what? Sure everybody, including everybody who had that argument with me have mood swings. I was just saying whatever that I feel like saying. So sue me! What is it so wrong about me being non-racist? Is it because I am not like you? What? That I don’t belong to your ‘elite’ team? I guess that is the price you pay for having your own individuality. Why do you have to pick on me? Why me? Why? Just fucking leave me alone and let me be whatever that I want to be. I’m starting to think that there isn’t any point at all for me to even try to unite with you all. I was being tolerant and what do I get in the end? Nothing I’d say. Why do I even bother? Sheesh. I just decided to keep my mouth shut if that what makes you people happy. Go ahead, screw me up real good while I suffer pain in silence.

Secondly, I thought of kel in a bit and I saw putra’s family in his car. Now, double dosage of depression I guess.

Nobody cares and nobody knows.

Now back to my depression mode...