Creepy crawlies.

After watching Waiting to Exhale on tv, I went to the kitchen to wash my glass and then *poof* one cockcroach came out from no where. Ohh nooooo, ya aint getting nowhere bugger.. I thought to myself. So I got myself that red bottle of insecticide and started spraying to that bugger's direction. After much spraying and all that, even the ants are already dead, that damn bugger is still alive running around like nobody's business! I only managed to kill it when it accidentally fell into the sink and it took me a nice 10 minutes of spraying I tell ya! Damn their sense of survival.

Okay this is the second time around of suddenly, another bugger cockcroach came out of nowhere as well!! Eurgh.. after finishing with the first one, I changed direction of spraying to this second bugger. He kept on hiding and all that but he was at the corner and it's kind of easy to pin him down. I managed to get him dizzy and then the insecticide died on me. Oh well, I just left him there while he's trying to turn his feet on the ground. Phew! *wipes off sweat*

Dont you just hate cockcroaches? Especially those which fly!!!
Brrrrr... I heard from my friend saying that they fly because they are females and that they wanted to protect their babies or smth like that. Is it true?

Hmmm. Scary shit.

Oh well on a brighter note, just to ease off your geliness.. check [this flash] out. ;)
Funny, thanks to princess.

Frustration (conclusion)

I was on the phone with ‘princess’ talking about how much that I’ve missed out for not showing up yesterday at ss. Suddenly I knocked off the basket full of remote controls on the table. Only to find myself the guitar string that I bought some time ago but misplaced it somewhere.

I’ve fixed it up. Go me! *sprung on my guitar*

26.06.03 marks the day I officially finished my exams and the day after that marks the day I handed in my two troublesome assignments. Why troublesome? It’s not because of the whole idea of doing the assignments but more like the whole process of handing in.

I rushed to complete my two assignments in 6 hours. My printer went zonked without ink. I rushed to save a soft copy in the diskette, without taking shower I rushed and changed to a decent outfit rather than my house clothes and grabbed my messenger bag. Arrived at the shop, the pc went zonked on me. Frustration. I called up a friend staying nearby and grabbed the key to the car. Crappy. I got stuck and I couldn’t get out. On my left, there’s kerb. I only had 6 inches of space in front and back. There’s a vehicle parked side by side with the car in front of me. After a thousand times of reversing and forwarding I managed to get out. I rushed to her house, got them printed out and I rushed off to college. Upon arrival, lecturer is gone. Damn I’m late by 10 minutes.

So many rush(es/s) and hell yeah, rocking rushes!

Woohoo. Exams over. *does a lil 60’s twist*

Waiting to Exhale is on tv later on 10:30pm.

Feel good about yourself and have a great weekend! :)

[soundbites]
J.Lo – I’m Glad

I NEED SPACE!

yes, even from the closest people that I know.

Please?

Why am I always the target of those fireballs you threw every time?

No, not willingly. Not even the slightest.

It's hot, it's steamy, it’s boiling, it’s scorching, it’s burning, and its 500 degrees!

Why?

Inert.

I took the last stick from the box then I went to the toilet in the morning.

Now I needed another one. I could have just taken the keys and my purse and head to the convenience store which is just less than 2 minutes away from my house.

I’m hungry now since I haven’t had breakfast and lunch. I’m not doing anything with that too.

Sometimes I think I sit down and notice things too much and that resulted in me not doing anything useful with my life. I’m just there, immobile.

I told you I’m faltering.

Days like this, I don't know what to do with myself
All day - and all night
I wander the halls along the walls and under my breath
I say to myself
I need fuel - to take flight -

And there's too much going on
But it's calm under the waves, in the blue of my oblivion
Under the waves in the blue of my oblivion

Is that why they call me a sullen girl - sullen girl
They don't know I used to sail the deep and tranquil sea
But he washed me shore and he took my pearl -
And left an empty shell of me

~ sullen girl by fiona apple

Pause.

I was doing a lil blog reading just now. I couldn’t help but to notice that people are so eventful and so occupied with their daily lives. Interesting.

On another occasion, I was having my late lunch alone just now. The rm4.80 chicken chop was nicely placed on the table and suddenly, I stopped and see the world around me. I didn’t move and everybody seems to be so engaged in their own lives and they didn’t notice me. I feel like I’m in Sarah Mclachlan’s Adia video clip. It’s alright to have that kind of power to sit down and notice things around you and people just don’t bother about you. It’s nice to see how fast the world can pass you by. I feel superior but at the same time, I wanted to feel inferior.

Although I have my education to concentrate on and my fag on my left hand to finish.. but what I really don’t get is my own life. It really made me ponder about my life.

Why the hell am I sitting here inducing radiation to my eyes while what I needed to do at this bloody moment is to study and work hard for my exams? Concentrate on my education? Fuck me.

Am I disregarding my life? Am I disregarding my future?

Scars are all over my history. Time won’t tell if I’m healing or not. Nobody can wipe off my history. There are just too many questions to ask. There are just too many things for me. I don’t want to feel a thing. At the same time I want to feel everything.

I’m too familiar with this kind of feeling now. For once, can I feel a lil different? Can I feel surreal? Can I feel happy?

I don’t make sense. I’m faltering.

[I do not wish to offend anyone with this particular entry. Especially with the terms like, Chinese, Malays and Indians. You've been advised. Read at your own risk.]

Well my hair is oily and smells like smoke, I’m sneezing and I was hiccupping.. oh yeah and I’m tired.

The gig started off a bit late, to be precise, it was exactly one and a half hour’s late. They were doing sound check and everything. Oh well, the organizer is a rookie in it and frankly, I don’t think you can blame people for being a perfectionist right? I got a lil frustrated at that but then I bore with it anyway.

There were too many bands playing and I actually lost count of it actually. I bumped into friends and people and started talking. Well mostly there are Malays as the majority and the Chinese as the minority. The Indians? They are in the middle lah. I guess the main reason for the attendance of more Indians for such gig is because of Poseidon and My Pet Alien. Both bands are from Penang and the majority of the members are Indians. Anyways the crowd I would say, turned out to be quite supportive. But of course there are less, erm almost non-existence of moshing but I can tell that the crowd really enjoyed the performances.

I would say that there are a few bands that managed to catch my attention. First of all, it has got to be My Pet Alien. They are the longest surviving band in Penang. Now, they have a Chinese fella playing the piccolo saxophone as well as the C# (I think) saxophone and boy he is good! Imagine that you have to cover the sound of a lead guitar, a rhythm guitar, a bass, a keyboard and the throbbing drums. How’s that? Very strong and every powerful indeed.

The gig was a comeback for the band and my friend just happened to play as a keyboardist for the band. Heh I haven’t seen him in ages! The last time I saw him was when I was in form 4.. now that’s AGES! I got to catch up with him and I think he’s a bit drunk after finishing half the can of Carl’s. LOLZ. Funny. Oh and I got their EP too, gonna let my friend pass it to me the next time I see him. But seriously, it is a great come back from the band.

The other band is Soft Touch, all the way from KL. The lady vocalist aka keyboardist rules man! She got dreadlocks and a cool one too! :D Man talk about dreadlocks, there are SO many people with dreads! Whoah! *envy envy* That aside, just too bad that her voice isn’t clear enough but I can assure you that she’s more like Tori Amos and Bjork kinda of style oh and she speaks quite fast too! Hehe. The drummer is Paul, erm he’s the guy who runs this studio or smth back in KL I think and damn although he is erm quite old, around the age of err 40 to say the least? Well, he sure plays a damn good drum. He has got skills man!! Thumbs up for this man! The guitarist was awesome, SOLO!!!!!! Phew, and that pouty upper lip! Oh my.. *drools* I would highly recommend this band to anyone. Nice Touch! :D

This rookie band from Penang appearing the first time on stage called Donut managed to get my adrenaline flowing. Although they are new and all that but hey! They’ve got good mixing arrangements. They did a cover of RHSP, err title? I forgot but it was quite hot in the charts back in 2001/2002. I know, I know it’s you.. dadadadadadadadaaaa.. until I say I do… Oh well, if only you could figure it out. :P

Moving on, Tempered Mental is smoooooooootthhhh. Melina has it man! She did a lil solo thing and everyone was so damn impressed by her skills! She is the spotlight of the band I can assure you that. She sings quite well, erm just that it’s not clear enough through the mike and all that. So I hear you want to know a lil bit more about this babe? Heh, she has got dimples except that she doesn’t smile that much. She has this serious look on her face and whoa, great complexion man. She is a babe! ;)

Of all the things that I forgot to bring along, it has got to be their EP. I should have brought along their EP and let them sign. I’m sure Khoo is going to remember me since he thought that I am organizing gigs and all that and I am the first Penangite to get their EP! I think.. hehe. So you can hear me saying “Tempered Mental Rules!!” and the bastard clapping and woohooing all the way. :D

Oh this band with two female vocalists sucks. Heheheheh! They picked Sixpense None The Richer’s Kiss Me, Shakira's Underneath Your Clothes and Avril Lavigne’s Sk8er Boi to play as their cover. *shakes head in great disagreement* Bad, Bad choice babes. But then again, one of the vocalist sounded quite okay when she sang Kiss Me. Heh I guess most of the guys didn’t notice it because they were busy checking her out! LOLZ.

The gig ended around 7 smth but then i had to pick up my mom so I left when the erm, some fellaAzmyl was doing an acoustic session. This guy is good too. He did the cover of Harmonica and he sounded great! It’s more like an acoustic jam session.

Heh well, the 15 bucks is all worth it.

I had a tiring day and me stuck in the house not celebrating bday with my friends in ss.

Hell, I don’t wish to do more damage to my ears. Too much for one day lah. Oh, I’m not happening anyway.

Good night.

Please put up with my shit.. or else, just shit off? ;)

This week's Friday Five.

1. Is your hair naturally curly, wavy, or straight? Long or short?
It's straight and it's around bra line so do you consider it long? Oh well, I've been thinking of trimming it though.

2. How has your hair changed over your lifetime?
I used to have quite long hair back in kindergarten years, then I had to cut it short since I'm going to primary school. So, I had to keep my hair short throughout primary school and high school years. But now, I can frigging keep my hair. :D
So cheers for me! Woohoo.

3. How do your normally wear your hair?
After washing, hair down definitely. During bad hair day, tie 'em up, wear a bandana, or a face towel as bandana(only once!). Usually wear 'em down cuz it adds a lil sloppy, sleazy, natural and lazy look. :D Very much mood dependant though.

4. If you could change your hair this minute, what would it look like?
Dreadlocks, definitely.. if I need not have to go through the consequences and aftercare! Hmm or maybe shave it off.. like yknow, Bold, to take the "load" off.

5. Ever had a hair disaster? What happened?
Heh not really but I used to cut my hair during high school when I was in form 3 till form 5. I did a pretty good job though so I didnt really had a hair disaster. ;)

Oh wait! I remembered one but it's not me having the disaster. Heh, wanna find out? Read on.

My family were at my grandma's house and while my sister and I was helping out my grandma to use a piece of cloth to clean the mahjong. Somehow my sister and I got into an arguement.. err you know kids like to pick a fight at the smallest things, heh. So I got really mad and since I was chewing a bubblegum, I took the bubblegum out of my mouth and stick it to my sister's hair. And erm, it's around the area of her roots though. Well, in the end, my mom had to use the scissors to cut off a lil of her hair to take out the sticky bubblegum and my sister looked horrible with a patch on her head which made her looks demented. Mwuahahahahahah..*grins*

Disaster?

Oh yes.. *nods*

Twisted and Warped.

Harsh words and violent blows,
Hidden secrets nobody knows,
Eyes open, hands are fisted,
Deep inside, I’m warped and twisted,
So many tricks and so many lies,
Too many whens and too many whys,
Nobody’s special, nobody’s gifted,
I’m just me, warped and twisted,
On my knees alive but dead,
Look at the invisible blood I’ve bled,
Im not gone but my mind has drifted,
Burnt out, wasted, empty and hollow,
Today’s just yesterday’s tomorrow,
I’m still here warped and twisted.

North Buddies Production presents..

A Day In Penang Gig : Drastically Simple.

Date: 21.06.2003 (Saturday)
Time: 12.30pm
Price: RM15
Venue: Actor's Studio Greenhall (32, Lebuh Light)
Performers: Tempered Mental, Soft Touch, Spunky Funggy, X Cited Screamers, My Pet Alien, Donut, Equipment Disaster, Fuel Injection, Poseidon, Predicate Not Define(d), Primrose Path and Zero Dimension.

For directions on how to get your butt there, you can mail me and I'll send you the map/flyer or if you search thoroughly, you might just find the flyer. Well, heh I'm lazy to upload the flyer. :P

Good afternoon headache.

I woke up feeling lost today. It reminds me of the song Arms of an Angel by Sarah Mclachlan.

When things started to get all crowded inside, big and little things, it gets too heavy and immense and it will burst one day.

Will you please drain me?

I got totally annoyed and pissed when someone left two voice messages on my phone. One was empty and lasted a minute, the other one asked me to call her back. I mean I frigging see the missed calls ok?

I know I shouldn’t be tense about this. I know it’s not supposed to be that way. I know I am a lil stressed over exams. I know I’m a lil unwell.

I sat for one external paper yesterday. When I got out of the exam hall, I should feel relieved just like how I used to feel when I always got out of the exam hall.
READ: should.

Well I still have my slammed phone on the floor. The receiver is not properly placed on the phone. The cable is not connected to the port. Nothing changed. And I am a lil immobile now.

Drained as drained can be,
Life is gone for me.
Drained if drained is free,
If only I could breathe..

Good morning headache.

Tired.

Worn out.

Down.

Mental.

Exam blues.
Hurhur.
Best of Luck to those sitting for exams :)

Hmmm since Im in the mood of posting smth up but not sure what to say about. Meanwhile you people just have to digest on this. Heh.

Girlfriends.

I have a new delightful friend,
I am most in awe of her.
When we first met I was impressed,
By her bizarre behavior.

That day I had a date with friends,
We met to have some lunch.
Mae had come along with them,
All in all... a pleasant bunch.

When the menus were presented,
We ordered salads, sandwiches, and soups.
Except for Mae who circumvented,
And said, Ice Cream, please: two scoops.

I was not sure my ears heard right,
And the others were aghast.
Along with heated apple pie,
Mae added, completely unabashed.

We tried to act quite nonchalant,
As if people did this all the time.
But when our orders were brought out,
I did not enjoy mine.

I could not take my eyes off Mae,
As her pie a-la-mode went down.
The other ladies showed dismay,
They ate their lunches silently, and frowned.

Well, the next time I went out to eat,
I called and invited Mae.
My lunch contained white tuna meat,
She ordered a parfait.

I smiled when her dish I viewed,
And she asked if she amused me.
I answered, Yes, you do,
But also you confuse me.

How come you order rich desserts,
When I feel I must be sensible?
She laughed and said, with wanton mirth,
I am tasting all that's possible.

I try to eat the food I need,
And do the things I should.
But life's so short, my friend, indeed,
I hate missing out on something good.

This year I realized how old I was,
She grinned, I've not been this old before.
So, before I die, I've got to try,
Those things for years I had ignored.

I've not smelled all the flowers yet,
There's too many books I have not read.
There's more fudge sundaes to wolf down
And kites to be flown overhead.

There are many malls I have not shopped,
I've not laughed at all the jokes.
I've missed a lot of Broadway Hits,
And potato chips and cokes.

I want to wade again in water,
And feel ocean spray upon my face.
Sit in a country church once more,
And thank God for It's grace.

I want peanut butter every day,
Spread on my morning toast.
I want un-timed long-distance calls,
To the folks I love the most.

I've not cried at all the movies yet,
Nor walked in the morning rain.
I need to feel wind in my hair,
I want to fall in love again.

So, if I choose to have dessert,
Instead of having dinner.
Then should I die before night fall,
I'd say I died a winner.

Because I missed out on nothing,
I filled my heart's desire.
I had that final chocolate mousse,
Before my life expired.

With that, I called the waitress over,
I've changed my mind, it seems.
I said, I want what she is having,
Only add some more whipped-cream!

I’m so tired. Yesterday’s night cap turned out to be kind of fun. I had one monster mocha and lots of card sessions. Upon my arrival, I bumped into one of my old friends. She came back from KL and she did a lil psychic thing for us with the cards of course. I guess what her predictions are correct, we are both far apart. Things just won’t work out for us. I suppose I can choose not to believe but then now I’d like to believe that. Please let me. It’s for the good, it’s a sign, and I’ll be fine.

Although I may not be as yeng as how she would put it but then I’m glad she did. I’m just being honest here. It sure made me kembang for a bit there. Heh.

I am so tired. I have pimples all popping out on my back and my panda eyes and oh this giant nasty pimple on my right arm! Eurgh.

*yawns*

If only I can get back into bed.

I’m stuck somewhere between the decision of staying back in Penang to study for my exam on Tuesday or to follow my family to go down to KL to visit my sister. Pros and cons. This or that. Tit for tat. In or out. Take or leave. Oh will you shoot me?

It’s rather complicated as it sounds but how the heck am I suppose to tell you if I’m not even sure how to put them into words? What has happened to me? What has happened to the world today?

You see people shoving up a stick in a man’s anus and use a calculator to rub at his genital to make it ‘stand up’, you see people hit and run, you see people betray friends because of the opposite sex, you see people being fashion victims, you see people trying hard to be someone else, you see people being stuck up posers just to be in the “IN” group, you see people being materialistic and looking down on other people, okay, I’ll stop. You get what I mean.

This is getting too far away from explaining how complicated my situation is. Sheesh, look at me now. I confused my situation with something else. I’m puzzled.

Nahh, you wouldn’t understand.

Call me bubblehead, will you?

Take me away,
I’ve got nothing left to say,
Just take me away.

[soundbites]
Roger Sanchez - Nothing 2 Prove

I got this in my mailbox today. I gotha thank Hsin for this. I cant wait to see ya girl! ;)

Twenties.

Confused?

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like.

You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't.

One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused.

Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person.

One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.

You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself.. and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

Anyone can relate to this, please raise ya hands!!!

You see that word "taker" below? Click on it and say..... err whatever that you wanna say. Raise your hands mebbe? Cheerios.

[Note: This post contains rather unpleasant tone. Be warned.]

Drag. I was at the airport yesterday to pick up a friend back from Auz. tu hia kau ti (hokkien) all also want to tag along and I have to be the driver. Misinform of time of arrival. There goes my time for studying. Oh did I mention that they also caused frenzy at the airport?

This girl broke up with the gf of 7-days. Yeah, you heard me, girl and gf. Go figure. Anyways the girl told her friends that she will be leaving for Johor to start a new life and she was pretty good at it. The gf got to know and rushed to the airport, to the receptionist, nope, no flight to Johor. Got mad, screwed people up in the public. Dahsyat. And next was car racing. I got home at 2 smth. I'm dead tired.

Okay, I’m just plain lazy to go into details and THOSE PEOPLE ARE FUCKING CRAZY, DEMENTED AND ILLOGICAL. AND THEY NEVER CHANGE.

Just go home kids.

Oh fuck me. Since I have to pass up my assignment, I just started studying for the test on Thursday yesterday and couldn’t get it to register. My hard disk is whacked. Yeah, I’m panicking.

*sigh*

Okay, panic attack be gone.

*sigh*

I had been aunt agony for the rest of yesterday and I’VE HAD ENOUGH!!!!
*shows middle finger*
I broke off with my bf. He was very sweet. He’s stupid. We did this together. I’m mad at him.
I seriously think that I am too nice.

I realized that I have been so.. erm, how do you say someone who was graduated from a Chinese high school but now forgotten most of the words, idioms, grammar and stuff like that? I don’t know. They are so Chinese-fied but I, on the other hand, am so western-fied. (?!) Errr, you get what I mean.

We’re of different wavelength.

Why can’t I feel normal?

My right ear was infected. I had to cleaned and disinfect the area and I think I lost the piercing. Fucks. Nooo.. more frustration.

I need to get high and take me away.

[soundbites]
Zwan – El Sol (LOOPING IT! SO FUCK ME!)

My thoughts are scattered everywhere. I want to go out for a drive now and where the fuck is my car?!

I cant seem to put them into words now.
Can anybody put the reason(s) into words why bloggers post up lyrics of songs into their blog?

Anyway here's one song that I would like to share with you. It's not a hit single *yet* but it is a hit single for this blog. The lyrics are rather cryptic but the song sounded very happy and up tempo. The magic of Mr. Corgan. IT FUCKING ROCKS. |m|

I've been listening to it over and over again and I am still looping it and loving it.

El Sol by Zwan
empty-armed
and half a soul to go

and all i wanted
was you here next to me
a little sunshine and sympathy

now everybody knows
that i've been hanging down so low
'cause now i'm feeling up
soon i'll be feeling out so cold
wondering, will you call
and now i'm feeling high
soon i'll be feeling left for dead
sometimes someone saying yes
changes what you'll bet

and all i wanted
was just to hold you close
a little sunshine
just to butter my toast
and your love next to mine

i had to let you know
that we were meant to be just right
heaven sent, not sympathized
by everybody's lie
and now i'm feeling high
now i'm feeling left so dead
kicking up the dust in bed
wondering, i guess

sunshine
sunshine
sunshine
and some tea

and your love
your love
your love next to mine

i had to let you know
i had to let you go so i
could see my life fade from your eyes
and to my surprise

that's what i wanted
it's all i wanted
it's what i wanted
me and you

Friday
Went to Jon’s farewell party and what can I say for it?

FUN.

I haven’t been to a party as good as this one.

Electric guitar. Acoustic guitar. An amp. Pedals. Effects. Woofer. 2 mds. Discman. US pizzas. KFC. Beers.. Loads of them. chang beer, tiger, Carlsberg. one big bottle of tequilla, extra strong. Hennessey. One small VSOP. Songs from Roger Sanchez. Cards. Three digicams. Drawing pad with pencils, charcoal and rubber. Familiar faces. Happy people. Cool people.

Go figure.

But of course, I’m gonna miss Jon.

Since it was dark as I was walking down the stairs, I accidentally tripped on the last step and caused a deep cut/scratch on my left foot. Stupid. And the worst part, I lost my favorite Swatch lighter. *sulks*

---------------------------------------------------------------

“Sodium lit roadside with long long roads with long long walks,
Eyeing the pale moonlight with ugly dark grey clouds and your Puma sneakers,
The retired ones, crying for usefulness.
Punches ironically coupled with hugs, computer assignments with ear surgeries reawakening piercings with a pseudo-breakdancin’ feel.
SA II stories with angry poses fingers flashing so suave with that retired cyan t-shirt I so know you from…
It’s been sometime I reckon?”

It was written by Jas.

Dude, I’m sure you’d be reading this.
Just wanna say a big THANK YOU to you. I try my best to be there for ya. Surely you can keep me in your list of lifetime-long friend. Thanks for your kind words though. Good times or bad times, I am still your friend. Nothing’s gonna change that. Not now, not even in the future. Thanks for everything. *hugs*

---------------------------------------------------------------

It’s a hot sunny day today and nonetheless, the wind is blowing gently accompanied by dried leaves. How gracefully they dance brushing themselves through my skin.

Ahh. Nice.

I’m so tired now. But still I have to finish up my assignment which is due on Tuesday.

Have a nice day. :)

[soundbites]
DDA - Charlie

Cure for pain?

I see this on the side of the pack of Marlboro lying on the side of my keyboard.

AMARAN OLEH KERAJAAN MALAYSIA : MEROKOK MEMBAHAYAKAN KESIHATAN

but I’m not smoking Marlboro. I’m smoking mild seven.
That pack of Marlboro is my ashtray.

No harm made right?

RIGHT?!!?!

*sigh*

I don’t know what I’m trying to say here.

Automatically my eyes were blessed with moisturizer and yes, I’m up. I’m really awake. Okay, now what? Problems are fighting its way to get my attention. Which one? Which one?? Which one is THE one? Frankly, I don’t know. Honestly, I don’t know. That free flow of moisturizer really made me think. It really made me think.

Oh no, I’m stuck. I'm repeating. I'm repeating!

I closed my eyes hoping that it will go away.

Did it go away?

One.. Two.. Three..

Chak!

Nope.

Still there, very still, very sad, very bad.

So what now?

You see that pack of Marlboro on the side of my keyboard?

Yes?

I’m going to put that into good use.

Where is the ritual
And tell me where
Where is the taste
Where is the sacrifice
And tell me where
Where is the faith
Someday there'll be a cure for pain
That's the day I throw my drugs away
When they find a cure for pain
Where is the cave
Where the wise woman went
And tell me where
Where's all that money that I spent
I propose a toast to my self control
You see it crawling helplessly on the floor
Someday there'll be a cure for pain
That's the day I throw my drugs away
When they find a cure for pain

by morphine

Stomach’s full.
Full of laughter.
Full of fun.
Full of water.

Mobscene by Marilyn Manson was on the air just now!!!!!
I sure didn't expect it to go on airwaves.. definitely not Malaysia! But it did! I heard it just now!!!!!

nahh I didnt manage to go for Eugene's movie treat. I didnt manage to get marshmellows for tmr's bbq also. grrrr.... :(

*ahem*
Since I've reminded HB to do his laundry, I think I've done my duty of being a laundry reminder lady.. and since Exarch is recovering and sleeping on his bed now.. and since Nigel has gone to take his shower.. and since I'm here for more than two hours.. and since my left shoulder is aching.. I'm going off.. since too many sinces

Good night.

I went to college to attend the 10am imaginary class. Very fun. Wheee!

I flipped through the papers today and I saw one article abt the BRATS interviewing BadBoyBen.. aiyoooooo.. it's a press conference thingy held in Penang. oh damn, missed it.. but come to think about it, I think I was cooking up a storm in my head trying to figure out why Malaysia deregulate its financial sector in the 1990s. Stupid assignments.

Hmm looks like there's smth wrong with the connection today. Frigging slow. What the hell is going on?!!?!?!!!!

Argh, stress.

Being a lil morbid today but managed to talked to Eugene, the bday boy. He asked me to go watch Finding Nemo tonight but nahh.. that's just an act of being spontaneous and sporting.

Let's see I've thought of Kel and Putra today. I think I miss Putra.. oh well, people come and go. I guess he's one of them. As for Kel, I dont even think he's out of my life yet.. but still, it seems like he already has.

Oh damn, craving for fags now. My classmates and I went to enquire about the universities in Auz and Nz today. In the end, Im getting mixed feelings about it. My biggest worry is my financial status. Im not sure if my folks can support me or not. Follow by which major I want to choose and do I qualify to go to that particular uni? What about my own level of commitment? right, by typing down these questions, Im starting to become more worried. I better stop. Think happy happy thoughts.

oh Yay! no more classes after today.. erm, which means maximum push before it's time to panic for exams. hurhur..

I dont know what I want to say here. I mean I have so many things in my head before this and when this page started loading, suddenly I lost track of what I wanted to say.

I think Im gonna die of road kill one day. Im counting my blessings. Anyone?

[soundbites]
Mis-Teeq - Scandalous

*burp*
It’s good and delicious to eat home cook food cuz you need not spend extra on outside food but then it sure does a lil expanding to your body. Heh.
There’s also this king of fruit that my brother brought home. Oh damn the burp sure smells like durian alright. Want me to burp again? Like eww.

I’m done with econs assignment. Yay! One off the list and still many to go. Oh well, gotha take it like a real woman. *shows almost non-existent biceps.. err fat?*

Anyway I went for the lecture and it only lasted for 45 minutes and the retarded lecturer gave us so called tips for the final exam and as well as so called guidelines for our two assignments. They are both due on the next day after the last external paper. Like so logical of him to do so.

The thing is, the factory didn’t even allow us to go to the production floor. They gave us lame excuses and all that. Oh well, we didn’t manage to see them produce pills and sorts or else it would have been very very interesting for the visit. The lady who guided us was being very err, a lil offensive. What she told us was all about quality assurance and some terms which we are not familiar with at all and she just had to go on with the fast briefing which didn’t allow us to have time to write down the infos. Besides that, she was being sarcastic just because we are studying business instead of science. It’s like she looks down on us. The way she put them into words actually belittled us. Ouch. She wasn’t that helpful during the Q&A session too. Sigh. *shakes head*

On a lighter note, BBQ this Wednesday.. Hurrah!!!
Hmm lets see, Father’s Day, my brother’s bday and also Eugene’s bday are approaching. In fact, another hour to go before its Eugene’s bday. alamak.. I’m gonna be broke.

I was thinking about something just now. I wonder if there is female aftershave in the market. And does anybody know the reason why Malaysia deregulates its financial sector in the 1990s?

Ooo boy, this is bad. This is typical thinking of business student. Heh.

[soundbites]
Snoop Doggy Dogg – Gin and Juice